haiz...i dunno why but i cant sleep...it's already 12am...hopes i wun get panda eyes..heh...i dunno y,but my days seems to be a lil' bit moody,even though u all seen me cheerful.haha..when i think over all this kinda stuff,i always realise that something is missing..i dunno what it is but i know theres a missing piece to my puzzle.i ant thinking bout this matter no more.Cause if we all keep on with this matter,theres no end to it cause we all misunderstoods each other..heh..i miss my skateboarding moments,i miss my happy moments at east coast,i miss my hang outs after school,i miss my sneaking out of home(sometimes),i miss the lucks we had at east coast,i miss the time when 5Cs have their own day w/o anyone disturbing,i miss 5Cs moments of cheering others up when their are down,i miss the conference talks,i miss the fun we always had,i miss the chaotic happenings that happens everyday after school,i miss the photo shots we always use to took,i miss all of the topics we always use to talk about,i miss de' love of friendships between each other...
i miss the trust that we 100% had for each other...it's not that i dun trust all of you,i realise,when i think over everything that had pass,trust begins to decrease little by little... =(if you all see clearly..i'm not really desperate bout Irahz,u know what i mean..i got someone i love so tts fine..i'm not bringing up de' issue.My only mission know,is to fulfills my parents dreams..and that is,first,to get scholarships(which is freaking hard to get)...and lastly,to create a very close bond between my little sister..My dad and my bro misunderstood me.they thought that i dun give a single care to my little sister..i dun like to show my love towards her,i dunno why.but i know that i'm protective towards her,which NON of my family members had seen it.my love for my sister is strong,but i dun show it..i actually had the pain in my heart,when my bro told me something bout my sis..this is what he said:"pagi2 bile abang bangun,nnti shannizah gurantee bgn.Dier kdg ckp dier tk suke ngan Dealya ngan Syafiq."who doesnt feel the heart pain when one of their family members doesnt even have a big love for him or her?from there,my sis have lose trust in me..even a 5 yr old kid boleh bezakan love and dislikeness..i was new to cry when i heard that.cause i know what goes around come around.if i doesnt treat her well,when i'm old thats gonna be the same thing shes gonna treat me..i dunno how but only God knows..what i'm trying to say is,let's just forgive sincerely.We are still young teens,and its too early to go through all this.i have to important mission to do..it's gonna be hard for me.its been so many days and this matter has still not been erased..Sha,to be honest,i dun really mind when you hang out wit them.I frankly totally understands what you meant as you mention below.I'm a human being eith the same feelings as everyone...you know how i know how you feel?it's because i myself has been through all that stuff.Seriously..about this matter,i'm okay with it..but i dunno bout you guys..Well,ppl chagne every single time bit by bit.Even i change,i realise thats.But if we wanna change,change into a better person..Insyallah,i wun change into another person,and be different like how you all use to nkow me.Mai&Sha,i know ive change and theres something missing about me which you all cant guesse it out.well,try harder then,try to recall what i am last year when im with you guys..kekeke...klahs,i wanna sleep already..it's already 12.30am...Nighty nitez!!!
PS:plese dun go and edit my post.Leave it original..thankz..=)
